a wee little update. (for the love of moleskine)

I just love those journals. It's my dream spot, my prayer spot, my day timer, my "what happened today," my list of to-do's, it's just a good place to write things.

So here's whats going on in my head, outside of cooking, knitting, wedding plans etc.

1. I feel like in the past couple of weeks (I'm catching this early) that productivity has sort of exceeded my spirituality which, is not in balance, so, I'm going to try to get back to that.

2. I really want to teach vegan cooking classes, and let people know how EVERYTHING we put in a meal could truly be beneficial for us. Where teaching a literal cooking class may be out of the question, hosting one on a YouTube channel (thanks Maria) may be a possibility. I'm doing research into recipes, finding out as much as I can about the ingredients (nutritionally) and considering having someone on the video with me making the food as well. It could be an interesting venture.

3. I love love love cooking, but I feel like my art has suffered. I need to make time every day! Why is it so hard for me to keep a schedule?

4. Alright this sort of overpowers no. 3, but these are some things I want to make time for each day:
-walking/running/working out
-time with God/bible
-art time
-social time
-cooking time and research on nutrition
-music

5. Yea, I don't know if I can get that all in in one day. Perhaps a week?

6. I imagine starting a YouTube channel would take up a lot of time editing, filming, etc. Perhaps Tal would like to help?

7. I found this website sporkonline.com that hosts online cooking classes, and their students pay money, monthly, or yearly, in order to take part...hmmm.

8. I want to have people over more often. I want games nights, and potlucks to be regular occurrences.

9. I want to get over my fear of buying alcohol. Every time I do, I feel like they think I'm trying to get away with something, and I'm not, and it's uncomfortable all the same. (not that I want to be drinking all the time, but I figure being able to buy alcohol without going into anxiety-mode is part of growing up).

10. If I can even attempt some of these things, I will be a happy woman.

Hopefully I'll have a video up soon and you can cook with me! I think that would be super fun!

Anyways, it's a gorgeous day, I'm going for a walk.

Peace.

Dreams.

I want to write a book.
I want to sell my art.
I want to know more about photography.
I want to learn to sew.
I want to record my music.

First in the morning.

This fall weather and the promise of a beautiful winter has made me so happy.

Sure there's days like today when I sleep in and then regret it for the loss of productivity, but then there's also days when just the cold autumn air makes everything okay.

Productivity can sometimes become a god.  If you serve it all day you feel good, and if you don't you feel like you could have done better. I don't think that's healthy, because there is only one God, and he's not productivity.

I do however want to learn to not be so lazy, to take better care of my things, and to be more accountable. These are preschool lessons, but I'm 20 and I still have to learn them.

(The other day someone asked me how old I was and it was the first time I literally forgot. Remember when you were little and you asked your grandma how old grandpa was and she'd say. "well let's see, he was born in '39 so..." that's what I felt like. I said, "23, no wait, 21, no sorry, I'm 20 and I can't believe I forgot that.")

I had a dream that I was part of this weird cult. It was super scary, because the main guy could kill you if you didn't obey, and what's creepiest about it is that when I finally did escape with a few of the other girls, we tried calling home from our cellphones, and the sound when they picked up was in the same bathroom as us... Meaning the creepy cult leader had programed our phones to only call his phone some how and he was somewhere in the same bathroom (with multiple stalls) as us. When I finally did get a hold of my parents, they didn't believe it was me and told me to leave them alone, because it had been so long and they thought I was dead. Bad dream.

There's some first in the morning thoughts for you. I hope to have a God-centered day that doesn't rely on productivity for fufillment (but at the same time, I still want to get things done).

Have a good day!
Peace.

A green tea affair.

As usual there's a few things on my mind that I want to talk about, the first of which being green tea and my disastrous relationship with it thus far.

Green tea is like the cool kid of teas. Well at least it used to be. Growing up I always loved black teas, Earl gray, orange pekoe, and English breakfast. Mix up a cup of half weak black tea, the other half creamo, and 2 large spoons of sugar, and I was happy (and hyper). When I first heard of green tea I thought, "wow now that's a sophisticated tea," but by this point I already had a horribly abusive relationship with coffee. There were some days in highschool when I would work out that I had had 1.5 - 2 liters of coffee before lunch! These cups were paired with copious amounts of creamo and sugar as well. Anyways, so green tea was cool, but what would
it taste like?

I thought I'd start my artistic tea phase with some herbal teas of the fruity variety. These types of tea (the raspberry, lemon, and peach zingers) are nowhere close on the cool scale as green tea, I do believe that even black teas are cooler than them, but I thought if I was going to ditch the creamo and sugar drinks for a more sophisticated cup that I should start with something that at least sounded appealing, "raspberry zinger anyone?"

Don't be fooled! Even when steeped for a full 4 minutes these herbal teas never taste as good as they smell. You can pretend to love them, but I'll never be fooled because they are disgusting and will never be loved.

So after a few months of faking a love for raspberry zinger, I thought, "yes now I am finally ready for the ever intellectual and intelligent green tea." I bought myself a "stash" green tea sampler. Even the names of the tea sounded grown up, "organic Japanese green tea, traditional ancient green tea, exotic blend green tea," etc. and the descriptions on the back of the tea bags were even better, "an exotic blend of 4 ancient green teas grown organically in the foot hills of (insert gorgeous place), a light tea with hints of dark rich nuts and fresh green leaves." Alright so it sounds grown up, but still I must try it before I can become an expert on the matter. I pick an original green tea from the sampler, it's described as light and nutty (similar to the rest). I steep it for the recommended time, let it cool down a bit, and go in for the first sip...

BLECH!

I described it out loud to my friends (I was 16 at this point) immediately after swallowing as, "it tastes like the water that you'd boil asparagus in!"

Needless to say I went back to my black tea, coffee, creamo and sugar. I left the green tea affair for several years, until recently where I've thought that maybe my pallate has matured and that I may like it now. I should mention that green tea has been out cooled by the ever exotic yerba matte which you drink out of a hollowed gourd from a silver diffuser straw, so even if I liked green tea, I still wouldn't be at the top of the sophistication charts, tea-wise.

So after many different types of green teas sampled, I have finally found a love. I thought that green tea would never be lovable, but I've found one. It may not be from a classy brand, or even blend but it's delicious, especially paired with a little bit of organic honey (from
happy bees and groovy beekeepers)! Are you ready?

Drum roll.

Lipton ginseng and lemon green tea paired with honey is actually delicious, and I am very happy that green tea and myself are finally in a happy, healthy, loving relationship.

Oh I know I said I was going to talk about more, but the tea affair took too long.

Enjoy some tea on this rainy November 1st!
Peace.