I love the identity the creator created, but am often stuck in the identity I've created.
Truth is there's a part of me that is proud of the identity I've created. Which is wrong, but hard to let go of.
Part of me loves the identity the creator created, and the other part still wants the old identity.
In a book I was reading the author said that a lot of people in full time kingdom work will try to always pick the more selfless road, because even if the selfish road was a more intelligent decision, it will undoubtedly lead to destruction.
My created identity, is most definitely the more selfish road. If I am walking a path to become more selfless, why would I be debating over which identity I should give my face to today?
Sometimes this walk gets complicated, and I get weak, but I know that He is the redeemer of my soul, and that without Him I would be wandering around aimlessly in my created self, trying to fill my life with whatever pleased me, and in the end find nothing but a bottomless pit of want.
The hard part is in our society, when finding, "your true self," is such an important part of mental development. I guess that the identity that God has given me is in fact, "my true self," but I've covered it up with so many masks that I like and have created to make some sort of mosaic identity on top.
If finding your true self in society is finding where you fit and where you belong, it makes more sense to take off all of the masks that we wear to find the true center, the core of an identity, then once we've achieved that to put on the masks of things that fit that core person. Yet, it seems that society does it backwards, to find ourselves we pile on a whole bunch of things (hobbies, clubs, etc.) to find out where we fit, and once we do we devote ourselves to it.
Boggling.
Help me to live in the identity You've created. Amen.
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